Hi!
May these words land in a way that serves & supports.
For any who prefer photo’s to type (generally or currently) skip to the end for a photographic resting place.
In this ‘stack’ you’ll find practice notes on 5 of my current go to’s for nourishing mind / body / soul / spirit through relationship with the Element’s of Space, Air, Fire, Water & Earth .
As I write:
The Spring Equinox & Aries season are fast approaching.
“Day light savings time” recently increased cardiovascular health crisis by a measurable (but seldom reported) percentage.
Ancestral trauma continues to wreak havoc globally. My prayers are with our kin whose lives are being ripped to shreds by a cultural unwillingness to heal & incessant tendency to deal with the charge we’ve received through extreme acts of violence.
We just moved through a Pisces new moon, on this waxing edge I am moved to share practices focused on contending with the hardness of our world while tending heart, softening mind & deepening connection.
Here’s (some of) what I’m practicing & observing at present:
PRACTICE: Expand sensory awareness to take in as much of what surrounds as is possible (safely). Notice sounds. Notice sights. Notice smells. Textures of air. Temperature. Whatever can be notice, take it in. Expand as wide and far as is safely possible.
Now. Cease focusing on any of it. Let focus become diffuse, receptive, open.
Avoid attaching to any of it. In attempting to avoid attachment, it often happens. If it does. Let go again.
What do you notice?
NOTES: I’ve been rekindling this practice after coming to the aggravating realization that I was unable to feel my heartbeat through interoception. I was not okay with that.
Through some trial, error & council from my beloved I came to the awareness that my focus was too sharp, too intense, my heartbeat was hiding.
I’ve found that through this practice my heart beat makes itself known.
It’s a wonderful feeling. My heart beating with soft, relaxed strength. I find it deeply soothing to “listen”.
Thank you SPACE for this experience & to Dr. Carlos C. Perez’s book The Flowering War: Toltec Teachings on Healing Ancestral Trauma, Overcoming Your Internal Enemies, and Fulfilling Your Life Purpose for reminding me to seek my heartbeat again.
PRACTICE: Breathe in for 20 sec. Hold for 20 sec. Breathe out for 20 sec. Repeat 3x.
NOTES: This is the final stanza of the 5 part Subagh Kriya which my partner & I have committed to completing daily for 40 consecutive days. For the full effect of what I’m practicing hit that link & give the Kundalini Kriya a test drive (careful…).
It has humbled me.
We’re currently in our 5th day of the practice. It took me 3 days to get one single 20/20/20 breath. Yesterday I managed two (with a two breaths in between them). The second took everything I had. I’m looking forward to witnessing the sensations of a full 3 (whenever I get there)
PRACTICE: Containing & moving relational charge.
Notice when charge comes up.
Notice the pathway it takes through the body-mind.
Acknowledge it.
Contain it with reverence.
When it’s time, move it with respectful expression.
breath
words
sounds
gestures
stance changes
spacial repositioning
Notice what happens in the body-mind & tend to any lingering impacts.
Tending can look like:
tension - stretch / shake / walk / run / sigh / etc.
dissociation - re-orient: bring attention to breath, look around twisting in all directions, notice & track sensory input emphasizing body placement in space. Connect with a “safe person” (be they human or otherwise).
hyper-focus - use awareness to zoom out & take in as many different sensory inputs as possible in the surrounding world. Drop into the type of diffuse focus shared in this months “space” practice. Repeat the process of noticing circumferential spacial occurrence & moving towards the diffuse focus as many times as is necessary for thoughts to slow/quiet/fade.
Bonus: connect to your heartbeat. By the time this happens hyperfocus has often dissipated completely.
etc.
NOTES: A man blew his top during a phone call with me. He cussed, yelled, blamed etc.
I don’t know him.
I have next to zero context for the nature of his life (nor he mine).
He threw his anger into my ears. Once he gave it me it became mine to work with.
I felt it light up my solar plexus, course up my throat like fire & heat me cheeks.
I noticed my vision become narrower.
I took a breath in through my nose.
I held my charge.
I didn’t rage back.
I didn’t hide behind false pleasantries to assuage his outburst.
I didn’t cut the call.
A part of me wanted to do each of these.
Instead I channeled the charge & used its energy.
Upright posture.
Firm, sharp, calm voice.
“My guy. I hear that you are pissed but I am not going to sit here & take your fire.”
A few more choice words from him.
I held my energetic stance firmly weaving with words I don’t recall now.
His anger sputtered, dying back into frustration.
We finished our business & closed out the conversation.
This is the practice. There’s not a script. There’s not one singular method that is “right.” It’s a nuanced approach to respecting charge & capacity. Both mine & theirs. The essence is to "stand” firmly in myself & command my space (no more, no less) despite what they might be doing.
The downside to this practice is that it requires work post interaction.
I received the full effect of his charge. It was enough energy to send another version of myself into a rage or a complete dissociative shutdown (possibly both back to back). I’m proud of the amount of charge I’ve developed the capacity to hold, it’s taken work.
Still, the after effects….
I had to breathe it out.
Shake it out.
Talk it out.
It’s these simple body based clearing practices that create space for me to live into my commitment to witness The Sacred in every experience. This means treating every interaction (internal & external) with reverence & respect even when The Sacred is taking the form of an asshole.
PRACTICE: “Stilling the Waters” as taught by Dr. Oscar C. Perez in his book The Flowering War: Toltec Teachings on Healing Ancestral Trauma, Overcoming Your Internal Enemies, and Fulfilling Your Life Purpose. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is finding value in what’s being shared here. Oscar’s work is phenomenol.
I feel comfortable sharing this practice here because he provides the details of it on a free podcast which can be listened to here.
Set a timer for 20 minutes.
Write non-stop for the duration of that time.
Non-stop.
Don’t worry about spelling
Don’t worry about punctuation.
When the timer goes off stop writing.
Do not read what you’ve written.
Put it away & walk away.
Do this daily for 28 days.
Do not read what’s been written during those 28 days.
At the end of the 28 days you can review what you’ve written as desired.
Oscar’s rec. is to time these 28 days with the lunar cycle by beginning on either a new or full moon.
The final stage of the practice is to build a fire & make an offering to it. Then to feed the pages written to that fire & witness them burning with gratitude.
*Please do support Oscar’s work directly. It is rich & grounded in deep cultural inheritance / practice.*
NOTES: As I write here I’m on my 9th day of this practice. I am loving the impact it’s having on me.
The first day of practice, I completed my 20 minutes. My hand was tired. My thoughts were quiet. I felt relaxed, calm & connected to myself. I felt at ease.
Each time I’ve done the practice I’ve had a similar experience with some difference.
My hand stopped getting as fatigued as I learned to relax it.
The baseline of my “thought noise” has decreased significantly.
I’ve had a daily meditation practice for the majority of the last decade. But haven’t had a writing practice for 4+ years now.
Adding this practice to my daily has been a game changer for my mental hygiene.
PRACTICE: Move across soil, sand, stone making space to appreciate the Earthlings who dwell along the way with reverence & gratitude.
NOTES: Enough words. I’ll let these pictures (taken with permission from those depicted) be the notes for this one.
Love this! So many threads to pull and ideas to incorporate into my own practice. Thank you!